Dear happiness, dear joy: welcome back

Listen to this:

Dear Happiness:

May I never be too coward to recognize you when you look back at me, may me being always a giver and a believer, never a fighter or a defensive poor sour soul.

May the stars continue to be mine, and the chocolate to taste always that good.

I want to be complice of my own joy, I want to cherish it like I didn't know how to do it when I was younger, because I was too stupid to enjoy the present and stop fighting.

So let me swim in flower petals where the skies merge the ocean waters, let me spread my wings and fly like a magical creature in the night sky that promises always a never ending tomorrow

Dear Joy:

I’ll be quiet and watch, as I come back to life.

And after all those times I believed I was gonna die, let me just then be humble and thankful, for I am still there to enjoy the warmth of a kiss, the joy of amazing good news, the beautiful sharing of a sincere friendship.

And the delightful snow falling slowly in the window looks like if everything had stopped for me to finally be in peace.

Also to the one that left:

I want to be that dumb person that you never let me be, I want to be super happy, super fortunate, super in peace with the world, super loving, super connected to everything in an intimate manner

When the morning comes I want to be with myself, for I am my one and only and I’ll hug my big heart who came back to life in the most tender of light, the one of a hope of a dying girl.

No death has happened, I am still alive, so alive.

To myself :

Let me smirk and smile, dance in public places and draw hearts in the window of the bus, let me dance with strangers and hug people who feel alone, let me give love and smiles to everyone that needs one, nobody to be sad of my happiness, no one that “can’t stand it”, it is mine, it is inside of me, on my heart and my veins, it is my life, it is my soul.

I am gonna receive all this with arms wide open, for when pain came I did the same, when loneliness talked I listened too, I am not afraid of it, it is all mine now.

Now believe me, I know it will be maybe over soon, but just as sadness was over one day, I will live it, I will dance with it, I will sing to it I will kiss it on the lips, I will swear that this smiles are my true love, and that this hope is the real me, because this time I am not kidding, so many years later, I am happy again

Marlin